::The Messenger of Rejection::

Nothing hurts worse than being the receiver of rejection.

But,... I must admit, it hurts just as bad when your the sender.

I mean, we all know that at some point of our lives, we experienced some sort of unrequited love, interest, and/ or attraction.

Put ourselves out there- made ourselves vulnerable for some lowly guy or girl, to eventually be shut down, turned away, or in whatever way discontinued.

But it sucks just as badly to be the messenger of rejection.

At one point, I had been friends with this on guy for about 2 months.

To be completely honest, I got tired of him.

And yes, I took advantage of his presence because I was bored.

Whenever I'd get bored, I'd call him.

Whenever I wanted to laugh for a few minutes, I'd call the guy.

It wasn't until I got completely bored and frustrated with his needy... needyness, that I realized It was time to cut him off.

Time went on, giving me an opportunity to think about the way I treated this guy.

I mean, I had, not too long before been in the same situation with someone else, being on the bad end of the bargain.

How much different was I from the guy that "G'd" me?

As I avoided his constant attempts to reunite,

I started to feel even worse.

I thought about it for a good while.

Its never cool- playing with someone's emotions for your own personal comfort or insecurity.

Either way, however it ends up happening, what you do will bite on the neck and I guarantee you'll feel the pain of that person.

When I was about 8years old, my mom dated this guy.

They had a two year long relationship,... talked marriage, the works.

He eventually betrayed her, leading to the end of their relationship.

Eleven years came and went.

Upon the passing of my dear aunt, he came to her funeral,

(considering his,... ya know, relation to the family).

This guy was married, two children.

He lived with the guilt

This man repeatedly apologized to my sister and I... explaining to us how much he loves my mother and didn't mean to hurt us.

Humorously enough, he told us he still considers us his children and still holds on to the artwork and toys we gave him.

Pathetic, isn't it?

Clearly, you guys should see my point.

No matter what the situation,... how it turns out, what it looks like,

It hurts to be the sender of rejection.

I think I might be a fan?

Algebra Blessett.
I've been fighting her name for the longest.
Friends of mine would have her on their Myspace top friends list...
My cousin Tiffany would talk about her music, but I just never fancied her.
It wasnt until my sister played one of her songs
"What Happened?" on her Purpose album.
I fell in lo ve with that song.
And when I say "fell in love", I mean,... the song has to be played at least three times.
Check her out, guys!

What Happened? - Algebra Blessett

Iluvu2much (Feat. Algebra Blessett) - Eric Roberson

Chanel Iman

Chanel Iman.

She's the coolest African-American model there is today.

Only 19 years old with a resume to kill for.

She's walked for GAP (My new company,...yay!) Dolce & Gabbana, and Marc Jacob.

I'd see every once in a blue featured in Teen Vogue Magazine and InStyle and really admire the way she dresses and carries herself.

Growing up the awkward girl in Atlanta, Georgia to become a world renowned Super Model is well worth it.

Rumored to have been dating musical genius Ryan Leslie, she managed to steer away from the harsh and in my opinion freakishly retarded world of gossip (ie: MediaTakeout) and maintain her untarnished image.

Check her out yall! :)

Who's the Best?

So,...
I've been MIA from my blog.
I have someone who I would love to introduce to you guys.
My sister...
Seanice.
I can honestly say I have the best sister in the history of America!
I can date ALL the way back to the early 90's.
I was a mere adolescent.
Back then, I'd do the most rediculously stupid things ever.
Light the carpet with matches...
Iron the carpet...
Stack boxes on the shopping cart to see how high I'd get.
I was a truly strange kid.
But my sister,... she was the good one.
The smart one.
I'd get into so much trouble, and she'd take the blame for it.Broke the bathroom counter...
She took the blame...
For my 18th Birthday, took me on the greatest shopping spree ever!
Did my home work for me...
Supported my pursuit of music.
She's the best.
I havent been the most supportive and encouraging sister.
And, I feel that she deserves this acknowledgement.
Right now in life, she's taking summer classes at College of Staten Island.
She ended her second year at Clark-Atlanta University
and is continuing her degree in Business.
Freshman year of her college career,
She was awarded as the only freshman to maintain higher than a 3.5 GPA.
Although she's harrassing me to use my laptop,
She deserves any and everything she wants.
And If I can give that to her in any way,...
I will.
I LOVE YOU NANI!!
NANI NANI NA NA NANI!
And here she is!!!
(Lets all give her a round of applause!)

Oh,.. by the way...

She's officially a member of the Mac Fam Organization...

The FOOL's!

Her Fool Name? Rum Boogy Don... lol

The name says it all

Last But not least... This is for you!

Happy Birthday!

PAID IN FULL!!! LOL

Road Trip

So, I've been gone for a while, but theres more than enough to talk about.

I went on a road trip to Rochester.

Had a BLAST!

My cousin Alicia was celebrating her birthday.

We went to Darien Lake Amusement Park and had a great time.

Here are the pics!

(Wish you couldve came Mannie!)

Late Late Night Art Gallery Shin Dig

Tonight has been one of the most superlative nights I've had in a LONG time.
A good friend of mine, Rebekah invited me out.
Her brother Sly planned to attend an art gallery and she thought I should come.
Along for the ride, was my super fun cousin Merisa.
She always knows how to have a great time.
It was so frikkin strange though.
The whole time I was there, I kept asking myself,

"Who has art showcases after 8pm?"

But it was soo awesome.
While we were there,... met some pretty cool people.
Not to mention....Free drinks. All night.
Take a look, guys.
(Well, not literally "GUYS",... When I say "GUYS", I just mean "YOU GUYS". I don't discriminate lol)

The train ride... that wasn't exactly the most EXCITING part of the night...

Met up with my homie doo wop Rebekah

These kids, lol... the guy (Steven: Personal Stylist) asks me to take a photo of him since he forgot his camera... as you can see, its CLEARLY on his wrist, lol. They were straight though.

This one... mi favorito. Created by Jayson (With a "Y") Atienza... funny guy

Taking this photo was a lot of fun. Some random pretty Blondie woman walked up to us.. shouting a little too loud over the music "You guys want me to take a photo of you? I LOVE taking photographs!"

So this frikkin awesomely cool photographer... Jason.. stops me and says "Hey, you have an interesting look, can I take a photo of you?". A few moments later, he stopped Merisa and asks the VERY same thing... Verbatim, lol. He was awesome though, :]

This picture is my favorite. Natashaaa... A really sweet friend of Rebekah and Sly's. The first thing she said when she saw us was "You two are so beatiful... nice smiles", in her very European accent lol.

LOL!!! HA!!! This was the highlight of my night. All I know was the light turned green and... the girl was stretched out on the pavement. A true genius.

Of course,... food had to fit in this story at SOME point. We hit up Puck Fair. Using only our charm and wit, lol,.. the bouncer let us in. The food was awesome.

Cab ride home was awesome. 20 bucks. Ya gotta love the Yellow Cabs... : ]

To some people, the night might seem simple and corny or just not fun enough to use the word "superlative". It wasnt your typical night out... loud deafening music, FIFTEEN THOUSAND people stepping on your brand new boots or, lights so dim you could hardly see your teeth. The night was smooth because I spent it with some really cool people... hanging out,... listening to music.... drinking, laughing, and getting to know one another.

Didnt even have to stay out till 4am with a hangover and a tat of the name of a guy named Hank.

Don't Be Bored...

Watch Family Guy!

Now, usually, I don't condone this kind of nonsense (lol),..

But, I'm guilty.

I. Watch. Family Guy.

I can remember my very first encounter.

It was a misty spring night in Williamsburg.

After a great dinner with on of my good friends,

We took a cab to my friends house.

After making myself comfortable, in his living room...

He pulled it out.

Yes.

He pulled out his...

His...

His Family Guy DVD!

And yes,... I liked it.

I liked it darn good.

LOL...

Check this out...

HEY MAMA!!

Okay, so...

I have the coolest Mom in the WORLD people!

Like, I won't even go into the thousands of retarded stories about this woman.

I mean, she's an Entrepreneur,

Super fashionable,

ALL the young guys want her...

(sometime,... even the ones I like, which isn't always.. ya know... cool, lol)

But, she's going away to South America...

Her homeland,...

LOL..... HA!

(Yeah,.. I don't expect you to get that one... right over your head, lol)

But, she's going to see my grandparents...

THEREFORE subconsciously permitting me to throw a party!!!

Isn't she just amazing?!?!?

So... here ya go!

Check out my Mommy!

(Well... I dont mean LITERALLY check her out, but like,.. look at her... like, SEE what she looks like, lol)

As I Promised...

So, yesterday, I told you guys I had two surprises for ya.
Today was my interview with GAP.
Unfortunately...
I got there late. About, 15 minutes late.
Not so too much of a good look.
FORtunately,...
I got the job.
Pay,... so-so.
But hey, I went from Old Navy SoHo
To GAP- 5th Ave.
The only problem now is-
They didnt tell me the day of orientation.
My cousin is celebrating her 23rd Birthday and we're all going up to Rochester.
I'm not too sure how it'll all work out, but, I'm very excited.

So, that was surprise number one.
I chose The GAP- only because its a perfect medium.
A little bit of Casual and a little bit of 5th Ave class, i guess.

Now,.. the OTHER surprise....
(::DRUMROLL::)


I CUT MY HAIR!!!!
TA DA!!!



I really like it a lot.
Had an interesting time cutting it.
Theres like, four different hairstyles in this one cut!
I came to the conclusion that short hair looks WAY better on me than long hair does.



OH,.. and bonus surprise....
I bought a camera!
Now you guys get to see my everyday life.
From my sleepy morning face
to my single-handed boredom photographs.

Aren't we all just happy now??!??!?

What a Monday?!?!

Today was a very interesting day.
I spent the entire night job hunting.
Well, a little more than the entire night, more like until 5:30am.
I applied for over 50 positions last night, and I mean 50.
It was kind've in my attempt to show God that I was making an effort.
Of course, I had applied to many stores days before,
but Sunday, my mother sat me down and said,

"Go get your job".

I stared at her thinking to myself,
"Jeeze lady, I've only been unemployed for a month?!"
Upon seeing my reaction, she continued,...
"I told your cousin to go out and find her job, that day- she got it. I told your sister to go out and get her job. That same day, she got it. So I'm telling you now, go out and get your job tomorrow".

Honestly, I laughed.
I mean, I thought it was weird for her to even say that out loud, lol.
Although I told her I would go and re-apply for Urban Outfitters,
I knew within myself- that was SOO not gonna happen, lol.
Everyone eventually fell asleep.
And while I sat out in the living room,
I thought to myself-
"For the past few months, I've desired for God to prove himself. Let me give the guy a shot".

So, at 3am, I got up onto my laptop, and applied for as many jobs as I could before I fell asleep on the keyboard in front of me.
Once 5:30 arrived, and my eyes could no longer stay open,
I shut down the laptop, and hit the sheets.
(Literally. I stood in front of my bed, and repeatedly hit my sheets. LOL! J/P)

Now I'm not sure WHAT time it was.
Maybe it was... I dont know, 10:30, and the chorus of Adele- Chasing Pavements rang in my ears.
My sister walked in with my cell phone in her hands.
The GAP called.
They reviewed my application and wanted me to come in for an interview on Tuesday.
It was awesome, and the manager who called.. I could tell she already loved me, lol.


But THEN!

I went to visit my aunt for a while... the day was just LOVELY.
Considering I had an interview tomorrow,
I figured I should go ahead and wash my hair at my mother's salon in ENY.
WHile there,... I did something pretty outrageous...
(I'll save that for tomorrows blog... leave a little suspense.. HA!)
and, without the slightest idea...
My cell phone rang.
Guess who THAT was guys??
No,.. it wasn't my granny...
It wasn't my boo boo guy,...
It was BANANA REPUBLIC!

Yepp...
Banana Republic called my for an interview...
THIS monday.
So, not only am I freakishly amazing, but, so is God

Now, I already know which one I'm gonna pick.
But, I'll save that for tomorrows blog too.

Aren't you guys just the luckiest.
Two surprises all in one day,...lol.

Pray for me yall!!

Alright, Alright...

So, I'm in a YouTube kinda mood.
I should be filling out job apps, but I got a little distracted.
Brandy!
Ha!
I can honestly say she's one of my VERY favorite artists.
She hardly ever gets credit for her talent, but you've gotta give her credit for this one.

Call Me Corny...

Okay guys,..
Call me corny if ya want...
Say, "Maybe she's in the Sunday Spirit"...
I don't know, I don't care...
There's this really awesome singer...
Mali.
I like his voice a lot.
My homie Olu put me on to him.
He's from Georia...
Check him out!!






http://www.myspace.com/malimusicnote
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=neD5tZlDCs4

Sunday Mornin'

Usually on Sundays, I'm awakened to a mass of confusion.
My mother rushing me to get dressed, somebody fighting for make-up
Who and who needs to use the iron,... its all just hectic.
This morning was different.
Everyone was in an unusually calm state.
Who needs help with what, jokes on every corner, it was really sweet.
By the time we got to church, I was open and ready to- just hear a word from God.
The message today was pretty basic, but I felt as if it were directed to me alone.
I kinda laughed to myself saying

"Well, if the man wanted to speak to me about something, he could've just called me",

LOL.
He explained that Christians are people who messed up and want to be Christ-like.
Ya know, for all of us. There's a period in time where we made some MAJOR mistakes.
Like, a good six months or even two years where we just felt like "doing me"

(Not literally ME, like "Nina" me, but me- "myself"- yourself).

I can honestly say that once I graduated High School, I was in the whole "I'm gonna do what I wanna do, because I'm always doing what I have to do. I wanna do something for myself for a change" mindstate.
I mean, theres nothing wrong with doing for yourself, but, have a motive to it, ya know?
And that wasn't what I was doing.
So, along the way of "doing ourselves", we, ended up making bad situations worse, and if not,
Making entirely new issues that never even existed!
But, afterward, we find our way back on the right track

(for some of us, that's God),

And get so high and uptight- forgetting that we were once the same as the people we're discomforted around.
I hate that!

But, that's besides the point.

The part that hit home for me was...
When you feel like you've done the worst possible thing there is...
or that you've made the biggest mistake and you just want ONE THING to work out for you...
Every single one of us know we at some point say

"God, please figure this out, man, like,... you gotta help me out SOME TIME?!".

And THATS the moment where he's listening the most!
That's the point when things can only change for the better!

For example,...

A clear glass sitting on the counter.
No water's in it.
With the pitcher full of water in your hand- ready to fill the glass,
Where else can the water go?
Can it go underneath the glass?
No?
Can it go all over and around the glass?
No?
If you pour water into the glass,
It has no choice but to rise up and into the rim.

I dont know if that made any sense,
But, my point is,
I had been feeling pretty crappy about the events of my LIFETIME.
Like, the past few months sucked MAJOR balls for me,
And I just needed a break.
But, when your at the point of realization that your life is in a frikkin heap of crapola

(Yes, that's one of my words,.. Crapola),

And you feel as if your going absolutely nowhere with what your doing,
the only direction you can go is up,
and I really needed to hear that today.
So, try church...
No, correction,...
Try Jesus...
It just might work*

Then again, your always invited to church with me.
I'm no super christian hero kinda girl,
I mean, we all have things we disagree with, but, I honestly think it works.
I'm not a frikkin retard just talking to myself and making up answers.
Enough of the rant....lol
Goodnight*

Marlon... Ooh Marlon..., and OH!, Shawn too.

Marlon Wayans...

I've loved him since I was a lickle girl.

HA!
Boy Oh Boy,
I used to watch The Wayans Brothers show EVERY FRIKKIN day after school, man.
But poor Shawn,... never real cared too much for the guy, lol.

Check out their appearance on the Chelsea Lately Show.

Is this how things go?

As usual, I didn't get any sleep.

Not even an hour.

I've been up for almost 30 hours.

I was so amped up for the day, I COMPLETELY forgot I was tired.

Monday would be the first day of Summer Session I for CUNY and I decided to register for classes. I went to City Tech as soon as it opened,

to only find out, I was still enrolled in Kingsborough and I needed to get the paperwork done before I could start.

I left campus went home to hang out with my "Guy Friend" of 2 1/2 years and it was the worst.

He comes to the house, jokes around with my cousin...

We're all having a sweet ol' time.

After she leaves, ya know, there was a little smooch-smooch, kissy kissy face going on, lol,

But, of course, I'm not trying to take anything anywhere with this guy.

We tried the whole Boyfriend- Girlfriend thing,

It just didn't work.

But ever since he heard about my last run in with my Ex, he's been semi-consistent.

I honestly just don't wanna go there with him.

Have you ever known someone who was almost perfect?

Great looking, good sense of humor, well dressed, the over all people person...

But theres that one thing about them you just cant deal with?

This guy has a MILLION and ONE female friends.

If you look at his page,

its PLASTERED with girls.

Today, when he asked me to be his girlfriend for the thousandth time,

I said to him,

"No girl wants to be in a relationship with a guy who knows more girls than she does".

I mean, call me insecure, but its the truth.

Just the same as no guy wants to be with a girl who's only girl on their MyFAVES are their mom.

Thats the truth.

The second and most important thing is, the sex situation.

I made an oath with myself to wait until I was married.

Regardless the end result,

I refuse to be the girl who has FOURTEEN names to her body.

And my friend of 2 1/2 years has been trying to be number one for all 2 1/2 years.

Its really tiring.

So, anyway, while he was at my house,

We were having a great ol' time watching tv and he starts making kissy face again.

It was all sweet until he started to go hard,...

Going places he doesnt need to go, if ya know what I mean ; 0

Thats when I had to put things in chill mode.

Once I did, the argument concerning why we cant be together came up.

The man just couldnt understand why I didnt wanna be with him.

Maybe its just me, but he didnt realize the only time the boyfriend girlfriend talk came up is when the sex talk came up.

Now, I know for a fact Im no goodie two shoes,

But I just dont wanna go there with anyone.

After leaving my house in a childish tantrum,

He texts me.

Here's the convo:

Him:

"You take me for a fool"

ME:

"If you really wanted to be with me, you wouldnt make me feel a way about us having sex. You should be fine just spending company time with me."

Him:

"I do... but we chill everytime, dat s**ts wack. If it was all about sex I wouldve been stopped talking to you"

(thats what they all say)

ME:
"Do You realize how silly this is?! If hanging out on the couch is wack, then find something else to do. I'm not having sex and if you cant deal, then idk what to say"

Him:

"I dont even wanna have sex with you nemore cause you act like a little girl... I just like you cause you cool.... you so worried about me playing you..."

Yatta, Yatta, Yatta...

Sounds like an ad from the "Just Say No Campaign, doesnt it?" HA!

The point is, he's really sweet,...

Yes, Yes,.. Mommy likes him,

but, the guy wants to have sex.

He's been trying to since the day I met him.

What I cant seem to understand is-

Why does he keep trying after all these years having not got anything?

Is this how things go?

I'm sure with out a doubt he has many girls to choose from.

Why me?

I mean, If its not just sex alone, give me your time.

Show me that your interested in me and not my Noonies.

I just dont get it?!?!

So, the jerk guy I've been talking about,
I completely deleted him from my life.

My life, meaning Facebook, Myspace, blocked the guy from AIM, all that funky stuff.

I'm not exactly sure when or how he figured it out.

I picture him logging on to Facebook...

After checking his updates,

He, types in my name on the search bar, only to realize-

I'M NOT ON HIS FRIENDS LIST!

HA!

But, he called my best friend today.

I'm not exactly sure what it is he has to say or why he's calling her.

It doesn't make any sense.

Its like, every time I try to get away from this guy, he tries to be all involved or just around.

I came to the conclusion,

He's insecure.

I've noticed that a lot of the girls he dates, their all either virgins, or really sweet laid back girls.

Somewhere in the story, something goes wrong and they end up having some sort of a passive-aggressive relationship leaving the girl wanting more from him but maintaining the friendship.

He treats these girls amazingly and then drops them upon some new discovery of female flesh.

But he eventually regains their friendship to keep them hanging by a thread.

Its like, he doesn't really want the girl, but he adores the attention.

He's not really good looking, but he's very charasmatic,

and unfortunately, we allow him to get away with his nonsense.

I dont understand it...

His mom is beautiful, but somewhere along the lines of DNA,

things got screwed up

Its all really sad.

My mom.

She's funny.

She's EXTREMELY sickened by him.

She thinks he may be, nursing a secret that hes unwilling to reveal.

We were watching "The Fashion Show" on Bravo.

Rico Chapple.

My Mom thinks the two have a strong resemblance.

Bored

Bored this summer...

http://www.cityparksfoundation.org/index.aspx?lobid=708&searchevents=yes&month=5&day=28&eventtypeid=-1&park=&page=9

http://www.facebook.com/ext/share.php?sid=83848732939&h=Du9qr&u=4J0GR&ref=mf

Dane Cook...I Think I Love Him

You might know him as Mitch Burns from "Dan In Real Life"...

Or Tank Turner for "My Best Friends Girl".

You probably dont even know who the HECK he is and care very little.

But, Dane Cook is my new guy.

Yepp.

No, but seriously, this guy is hilarious.

At first, I thought this guy was frikkin wack.

Like, I forced myself to laugh the first time I saw him,

But, seriously, watch this video... you'll understand.

If not,...

GOD BLESS YOU,...lol

(Not like, God bless you hahaha, but like, God bless you, good luck getting through life with out a sense of humor..HA!)

Scented Toilet Tissue?

Can anyone tell me what scented toilet tissue is?

What the heck is scented toilet tissue?

I mean, If your bum smells like cat turd, the simple solution is to take a shower.

Soap included.

Seriously, though... "Fresh Linen Scented Toilet Tissue?"

Whats the purpose?

Make It Lady from the UK states:

"I just bought some toilet paper that was on offer. When I got
it home I discovered it was scented. The scent was fresh linen! Firstly, why
would anyone want scented toilet paper and secondly, who would wipe their nether
regions on fresh linen. I wouldn't want this person stopping in my guest
bedroom."

Just use Cottonelle Kleenex Toilet Tissue...

I promise.

It works.

It cleans.

Otherwise, take a shower.